


It's Always Been You

by pastelxzavva



Category: Banana Bus Squad
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Phone Calls, implied suicidal thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-20
Updated: 2017-08-20
Packaged: 2018-12-17 15:20:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11854320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pastelxzavva/pseuds/pastelxzavva
Summary: John nearly makes a bad decision, but Smitty's always there for him.





	It's Always Been You

“John, don’t give up on me, please. I need you in my life, I love you so much, you’re everything to me and your fans and our friends. Just… don’t leave me, please.” Smitty begged over the phone, voice shaky, biting his lip at the silence on John’s end.

 

“John?”

 

“..You love me.” Not a question, a statement.

 

“Yes.” Smitty swallowed hard. What was John doing?

 

“Why?” Oh, okay, he could do this.

 

“‘Cause you matter. Your smile makes my stomach twist and your laugh makes my heart flutter. Every part of you, every flaw you see makes you stand out even more and you matter to me, so goddamn much and I don’t know how to explain it. It’s not something you explain, it’s something you feel.” A pill bottle rattled on the other end and Smitty faltered.

 

“...You done?” John asked, quietly.

 

“No.”

 

“Then keep going.” John murmured, and Smitty easily complied.

 

“It’s… you once told me that there was a person that whenever you were around you didn’t want to hide. You wanted to show them everything,  _ give _ them everything and fuck, I swore to myself I’d never tell you that I felt that way with you because I hate being emotionally vulnerable. I hate being this open, this genuine because I’m  _ scared _ . I’m scared of myself, scared of getting hurt. I’m scared of  _ you _ at times, John, because I think you’ll turn around and stab me, just like it seems everyone else does. I don’t know how or why you’ve stuck around for so long, but I appreciate it more than you think.” Smitty rambled, finally shutting his mouth.

 

John stayed silent before speaking, just before Smitty was about to apologize and hang up.

 

“That person that I never wanted to hide from… Smit, that’s  _ you _ .” John said, slow, gentle.

 

“...it is?”

 

“Always has been.” A little  _ oh _ on Smitty’s end is suddenly the funniest thing John’s ever heard and he laughs. He throws his head back and  _ howls _ with laughter, Smitty joining in.

 

“Oh… I love you so much.” Smitty sighs, still a little giggly.

  
“I love you too. In fact, I’m going to go book a flight so I can come see you. Bye.” Smitty’s cut of  _ no, wait! _ Sounds in John’s ears and just makes him grin.

**Author's Note:**

> If you guys want I'll make a second part of this where John meets Smit up in Canada  
> Fluff will ensue, smut if you guys REALLY want,,, idk


End file.
